BKB: How one Burger King employee singlehandely destroyed my husband's life (almost)

Once upon a time, I was on a road trip with Danny, my brothers Andy and Scott, and my quasi-brother Kyle.  We were returning to Utah after a week-long trip in California and Oregon. Little did I know that this trip home would change my life forever ...


As we were passing through Boise, we decided we were hungry.  We knew we wanted two things: (1) a QUICK pit-stop, and (2) hamburgers.  So we went to a Chevron that had a Burger King restaurant next door. 


While Danny and I pumped gas and washed the windows, Andy, Kyle, and Scott ran to Burger King to expedite the process.  After we finished at the gas station, we joined the boys at Burger King.


Much to our surprise, they had not even ordered yet. 


What's going on? Why is it taking so long?


I guessed there was someone else in front of them that was taking a long time to order.


However, we looked around the restaurant and, since it was Sunday afternoon in Boise, it was empty.  Empty except for one person, a Burger King employee ... it was BKB (Burger King Boy).  He just sat at his table chuckling to himself ... probably imagining the things he had in store for us.


Weird.


But eventually they got up to the register and were able to order.  Kyle was the last of the boys to order.  Last year Kyle had a skateboarding accident and suffered massive head injuries and underwent brain surgery ... so, in an effort to make the most of his condition (hoping for a discount), he asked the manager who was working the register, "What do you do for disabled people?"  The manager replied, "We give 'em jobs!"


That's funny.


We thought it was a joke at the time, but he was actually drop-dead serious.


So, finally Danny and I ordered our meal. 


The boys received their meals.  And it just so happened that right when they were going to get napkins, BKB decided it was a good time to refill every napkin dispenser, starting with the one nearest the soda fountain where the boys were.


How annoying.


So, the boys finally got their napkins and sat down.  They ate their meals.  We continued to wait for our meal.  I eventually persuaded Danny to go up to the counter and ask what was taking so long.  We soon found the answer.   

"This guy," said the manager while pointing at BKB, "just handed your meal to the people in the drive-thru.  They just paid two dollars for nine dollars' worth of food."  The manger looked at BKB like he was looking at a little puppy who just peed on his carpet -- frustrated but knowing he can't get too mad because the young guy is just not capable of doing any better.  "Don't worry," he assured us, "It's coming out of his paycheck."  To which BKB responded, "What paycheck?"

Was that a joke?

So we waited again for our meal.

In the meantime, Kyle had ordered another hamburger "to go."  He received his hamburger. And he ate his hamburger.

Then our meal came.  It was definitely not worth the wait.  In an effort to appease us, they had given us ONE complimentary slice of chocolate cheesecake.  How nice.  Then, BKB walked back to our table and attempted to give us a second slice.  I say "attempted" because he set it down on a sloped french fry container, so it immediately fell onto the floor.  Luckily, the cheesecake was served in pre-packaged, safety-sealed, piece-of-pie-shaped boxes, so it wasn't ruined.  BKB picked it up (from the floor) and this time put it in our french fries. 

Wonderful.  I always wanted a little "BurgerKing floor" to go with my fries!
Since this was supposed to have been a quick pit-stop, we rapidly ate our food.  We finished eating and Danny needed to use the restroom.  So, he walked into the restroom.  Less than ten seconds later he walked back out. 

"That was fast," I said.

"Let's get out of here! Quick, this kid is single-handedly destroying my life!!" Danny went on to explain that BKB had chosen that precise moment to begin mopping the men's restroom. 

Who knows what catastrophe could have afflicted us, had Danny stayed in that restroom?  And who knows why this Burger King employee seemed to have it out for us?  Was he just incompetent?  Or was it his design to entertain himself on a slow Sunday afternoon at a Burger King just outside Boise? 

We may never know.

But what I do know is that we made it out

... just

... in

... time.